Our Forever House

"If you don't like where you are, then change it. You are not a tree."  ~Jim Rohn

For years we moved where ever the navy sent us. While we were in places long enough to buy a house and actually make it our own, there were certain things we weren't willing to invest in because we knew it was not our "forever" house. We're feeling that again. We're getting restless and realizing that we're waiting for our next "orders". We have come to the conclusion that our "forever" house is in heaven. This is not to say that we won't end up someplace permanently at some point we just aren't there yet. Keegan will graduate in the spring and will be attending college somewhere else, could be as close as Bloomington, IN or as far as Charleston, SC. Regardless, there will be nothing really keeping us here, our families are far away and all the older boys are moving on. As usual, with every town we've been in we have met amazing people. I know we weren't particularly great friends to many as far as reciprocating their generosity (we had our hands full with teens this time around, some not even our own), but so many of you were great to us and that was such a blessing.

Now we start the prep for whatever is next. For 2.5 years we have lived here with some projects that we planned to get around to. The pressure is on since we're hoping to put the house on the market in the spring. We have made lists of jobs and are slowly ticking off the boxes. Each time one is completed I wonder why I let it sit. My family and I deserved to live in a complete home. Why do I prep it for strangers and not the people I love? Crazy! Lesson learned! I will say I'm so grateful that we have mad DIY skills. Being in the military forced us to learn things we may never have learned otherwise, mostly because we were poor enough that the "professionals" were not an option. But also, when Brian was gone I had to learn to do it myself or wait for months until he came home. Together we're a pretty awesome team.

Our future is a bit hazy right now. We may just move up the road a ways if Keegan goes to IU or maybe Duke will have a position available that Brian can't resist in some other state. There is no rush, just the anticipation of what comes next and the knowledge that this is not our "forever" house.

Until next time,
Julie

K.I.S.S.

Keep It Simple, Stupid. My new motto.

I'm finding the older I get the less I want. There are very few things that I really value and none of them are "things": faith, family, friends, and travel. That's pretty much it. Once upon a time I aspired to having a big house and decorating it with cute things. I love our house, but it's too much. The upkeep is crazy time consuming, whether it be cleaning it or fixing something, and often expensive. And the chotchkies all over the place, aside from the ones we've gotten traveling or our personal photos, the rest is just stuff I have to dust. How often do I "treasure" that thing I found in Target 2 years ago? It may have spoken to me at the time, but now it sits on the shelf and the only time I look at it is when I have to clean it (and then it's with resentment). You should see my bathroom drawers and shelves, (actually NO that would be horrifying) filled with lotions and potions and makeup that I never use. I imagine most of it is bad at this point, those things have shelf lives I hear. My closet is filled with clothes, some are so old they are out of style (if they were ever in style, that's not really my thing either). If it's not jeans and t-shirts, it just hangs.

My retired mom decided a couple of years ago to throw all her stuff in storage and travel around in her motor home. She has had a blast! She spends a month here or there, travels to see her kids and grand kids and lives full time in that little house on wheels. Talk about having to simplify down to the basics. She cruises through her hometown to switch out summer to winter clothes or vice versa. I envy her being able to do that. Clearly, we are not in a place right now where that is possible. We have kids in school and Brian has a full time job, so that kind of travel is out for now. The simplifying is totally doable! We recently bought a camper and have gone camping a couple of times and had a great time. We essentially chose to leave our big house to stay in a TINY apartment for a few days and missed NOTHING. Obviously, living on top of each other like that would get old after a while, it's an extreme the other direction. However, it takes 5 minutes to clean the whole camper and the rest of the day is ours. We had so much more time to "play". I'm all about that!

My point, I suppose, is that I feel like I'm crazy busy doing things I'd rather not be doing... and I've done it to myself. Why have I created this high maintenance lifestyle? I didn't do spring cleaning this year, but I'm feeling a Fall dump run coming on... ;)

Until next time,
Julie

Balance...I have none!

It's been a while since I've blogged about anything. This summer has been fairly busy and (insert several other excuses here). I seem to be having a problem finding balance both figuratively and literally. I love that I'm not having to track anyone's grades or extracurricular mandatory activities, as I have to do during the school year, however things are still hectic for whatever reason. Brian and Keegan both work and finding opportunity to do things together is very difficult and somewhat discouraging. Brian has had to travel quite a bit and Keegan is in the food industry so his hours vary. James, one of our extra "sons", had to have surgery at the beginning of the summer and so has been in recoup mode for the last few weeks. I have had the annoying addition of bouts of vertigo and a fairly aggressive ear infection that doesn't seem to want to go away. I took some heavy duty meds for a couple of weeks, but as I sit here there is still quite a bit of pressure and the walls of my house occasionally jump out and get me. Let's hope that will end soon.

With everyone, except Kieran, being adults now finding opportunity to spend time together as a family has all but diminished. Our family meals which have always been opportunity to connect at the end of the day often include several empty chairs these days. I'm begrudgingly adjusting to this new lifestyle. I miss my babies, but I'm really proud of the men the are becoming. They are for the most part responsible productive members of our society as they should be. We, as parents, seem to be doing our job right.

All is not lost, though. In the midst of it all we find little pockets of time to be together. We have family nights watching a movie or playing games, even if we are missing someone. We just spent several days in our camper out at Spring Mill, IN. It was so nice and quiet. We spent our time playing games, walking the park, eating yummy food, and just generally stayed disconnected from our normal life. There was no wi-fi and very limited cell service and that was OK with us. Keegan is in Honduras on a mission trip so the only updates we really wanted were from their leader. It was hard to come back. I like my kids, I miss them because I really like them. I like to visit with them and cut up about silly stuff. I like having conversations with them whether it be in depth or nonsense. I like watching them interact with each other. I like that we are happy to be together when we can be. I like that Kevin wants to come home from college and hang out with us. It's not the quantity of time I hoped for, but I'm going to make sure the quality is there. Maybe we can't do everything with everyone, but the things we can do...we're all in!

Until next time,
Julie

New beginnings

The last couple of weeks have been filled with end of school events, last-minute-scramble-to-get-good-grades, and graduation activities. We have two boys in our home who graduated and we couldn't be prouder of them. We had a party for them in our home with their friends and family... and I spent the whole day getting choked up. I'm not sure why, they are not my boys (although I love them to pieces). I keep thinking about what an exciting time it was to graduate and also the sense of having a new beginning and what will be made of it. Maybe their circumstances have not always been ideal but they are in charge of what happens now. It's a clean slate. Nothing is more liberating...and frightening. Now there is no one to lay the blame on. You are responsible and accountable for all that happens going forward...good or bad.

I am 20 something years out from that moment and I am not at all where I thought I would be on my graduation day, but I couldn't be happier. Really, life unfolds in such an amazing way and while we have these grand plans on that big day, your path rarely stays true to them, and it's OK. Things have happened that I wish I could change, but I might have missed out on the extraordinary lessons that have formed me. There have been so many unexpected blessings, though, that offset those disappointments. I'm not a teacher, I started school to be one, never graduated. I had a 4 year old who was having seizures and another on the way when I decided that was no longer a priority for me. That particular "dream" had been replaced with a much better reality. Not better that my son was having seizures, but that my family was so much more important to me than checking that particular box. I've never regretted it. A few years ago we were planning how we would spend our time when our two boys were out of the house, then we had a third child...completely unexpected... and such an amazing gift for all of us. It's OK that those plans are on hold, this experience is so much richer.

I don't know what the future holds for these boys, but this Gary Allen song keeps running through my head:

But the struggles makes me stronger
And the changes make me wise
And happiness has its own way of takin' its sweet time

No, life ain't always beautiful
But I know I'll be fine
Hey, life ain't always beautiful
But its a beautiful ride
What a beautiful ride

They are bright young men and have overcome their circumstances. I am hope filled!

Until next time,

Julie

White Girl

Every spring I put on my shorts for the first time of the season and in my head I hear in a deep rumbly voice, "Oooo, Girl, you're about the whitest thing I ever did see." It still makes me laugh because it was said by the darkest man I have ever met. One of our son's closest friend's grandparents lived in our neighborhood and he played at their home quite a bit. I used to go shopping with his "Mimi" and the boys would stay with his grandpa. His grandpa was washing the car when I walked up in shorts for the first time one spring and that is what I heard. He then walked over, held his arm down next to my leg, shook his head, and went back to washing the car.

I fall into the redhead/white skin category. We have two skin color options, red or white, and you know red heads should stay away from red...it clashes with our hair. Truly my hair is strawberry blond but my skin doesn't seem to get the distinction. Since skin cancer tends to run in the family I slather up before going outside so I can keep my pasty skin... well, pasty. Also like a true redhead I have freckles on every spot of my body. I don't get to have the beautiful porcelain white skin to make up for lack of being able to tan. Awesome!

This almost complete lack of melanin used to bother me. I wasn't going to ever be the cute tan girl in the bikini, you should put shades on to look my direction at the pool. I have grown accustomed to my skin over the years and now I actually own it. It's all good! Because I have stayed out of the sun or drowned myself in sunscreen, I have managed to stay a bit fresher. It has slowed the aging process down for me and I can't say I'm unhappy about that. It's fun to still get carded occasionally, not because I look under 21 but apparently younger than I am. I'll take it.

So when you see all the pics this summer of the hot babes on the beach, I'm the pasty white girl in the back ground.

Until next time,
Julie

Five Men and a Baby

We felt called and have the ability to help out a couple of young men who, through circumstances outside of their control, needed a place to crash. They have been with us for a couple of weeks now and will continue to be until they graduate high school and move on to their perspective AIT schools in mid June (both in the National Guard). They are good men, will graduate from Lincoln with honors, and have a wicked sense of humor so fit right in to our family. They are also great with the little man, who LOVES having all these guys around. There is never a dull moment in this house. However, having 5 men and a baby is a challenge, to say the least. We have friends who have larger families than this and I applaud them! 

Where do I put all these people? When I brought the oldest home from college he took over his usual space, the den with the pull out couch and all the amenities. So we now have my middle son sharing his room with our two guests. There are two beds in there with another twin mattress tucked under that is pulled out at night. The beds are just for crashing, though, because frankly that room has turned into gaming central. There are two large TVs in there with every imaginable system hooked up as well as the computer in the corner with it's dual screens. Apparently, we can't all play the same game at the same time on ONE TV. To top it off, another TV was brought in last night and hooked up in the basement with even more systems. Wow! The extra TVs actually belong to our guests who obviously came with LOTS of electronics...and baggage...

We have set up a system in the bathroom so that each one has a hook for a towel with their names above it and a laundry bag system, again, labeled for their convenience. Should anything actually end up in there remains to be seen as most of the time the floor is carpeted with clothing...clean, dirty? Who knows... I don't do it. I've showed them all how to use the machines, good luck with that. There are several large built in drawers in that bathroom so they have each been given drawers for their clothing and half of a closet to hang things. The good thing, I suppose, is they are all going military so they might as well get used to sharing tight quarters. 

Food! Oy! Can you keep enough food in the house for men? Short answer...NO! I try to cook a few meals a week and have pizza, sandwich, or hot dog nights to offset that. Thankfully, because they are all in school until May 24th they eat breakfast and lunch there during the week. My job is just to provide dinners. They are responsible for their own snacking. I will say, that I have loved having a full table for dinner. We laugh and listen to them tell stories and share our day. Nothing beats that in my book. 

Is it tight? Yes. Is it chaotic? Yes. Would I change anything? No. We have been blessed by these boys and hope that God will bless them while they are in our home and in their futures.

Until next time,

Julie

Vacation Season...Woo Hoo!

The kids are in the final stretch of school so we are trying to plan our vacation. I've mentioned that we will be camping our way to Mt. Rushmore, and we've also decided to hit up Albuquerque for the Balloon Fiesta this year, which has the added bonus of visiting my folks and my brother. Seriously, you know it's the other way around, it was time to go home and visit but we've decided to do it during the Balloon Fiesta. I'm excited for both trips.

I believe vacations have a cycle. Here's the pattern: (This applies to those of us who left home and went far far away.) When you are young, broke, the only 'vacation' you take is to get home to see your family and since you will be staying with them you can 'afford' it. When you finally get a career and are doing OK, generally married with younger children,  you still go home for 'vacation' and see the family because you want your children to have a relationship with them. The years tick by and you're doing better financially, but the kids are in school and so vacations only happen in the summer and holidays. Typically you save the trip home to see the family for the holidays and try to squeeze in an actual we've-never-been-there vacation in the summer. Finally, you are doing well in your career but now the kid goes to college so it's back to broke...time to plan the trip home again.  I've finally realized why the commercials for these fabulous luxury vacations generally show more mature couples...not old, but empty nester age. Brian and I took our first real couple vacation last year, and we were only able to do that because my mom rocks and came out to hang with the kids. We won't be able to do it again for a while, just as we have one son finishing up college we'll have another going in, and of course helping them is more important.

I bring all of this up to say, planning vacations becomes serious business, as a result. We don't do them often and so they have to count. Brian starts throwing out ideas very early in the spring, generally huge unrealistic plans that I immediately shoot down. (I am the chief financial planner in this house.) Then over the following weeks we will narrow it down to more reasonable yet still fun destinations. It's an exciting time and we are all ready for a break. There will not be many more opportunities to travel with all my kids at the same time, they will grow and will leave and start their own vacation cycles. I have to soak up this time and store these memories away, because one day I'll be on vacation with Brian wishing I had the little rugrats running around me.

Until next time,
Julie

I LOVE camping...kinda

Spring is finally here! I'm a big outdoors kind of person. I love to sit outside in the backyard while little man plays. I love grilling out and sitting around the fire pit (I live for s'mores). I love going to beautiful places and hiking, or kayaking, or fishing, or hanging out at the beach. I love everything about camping... except the camping part. The part where we go to our tiny tent, plop down on an air mattress, have to find a comfortable position AND maintain it all night so that our movement doesn't catapult the other person off the bed or cause them to sink to the cold hard ground... once we've assumed said position hope that not everyone in camp will keep us awake since we can hear everything. AND THEN, God forbid you have to use the restroom. Another part of camping I don't like...crawling out in the middle of the night and hiking to the loo. Um, no!

I want a pop up camper. I'm trying to talk Brian into one versus a big camper because, quite frankly, I don't want to haul a monster around. We've used a pop up before and loved it. It had all the amenities without the bulk. We want to go camping this summer and I want to head up to Mt. Rushmore. I'm psyched but I don't want to rent an RV, I want my own little mobile home to tag along. I realize that it's not the Hilton and there are nicer ways to travel but I'm just looking for a step up from the tent. I also know it is not sound proof but the walls are thicker than a tent. I want to be able to load it down...and not the whole back end of my car. I want to be able to have everything stored where it will be for the most part without dragging it in and out. I want to be comfortable if it rains or if there is an infestation of annoying flying things. I want to get up in the middle of the night and walk two feet to the toilet. (It's the little things that make me happy) I want to enjoy all the daytime camping activities without all the night time hassle. Power, water hookup, and wifi would be nice too. I'm just saying...

OK so I'm spoiled. I didn't grow up on the frontier and I did the Boy Scout thing...I'm over it.

Until next time,
Julie

PS If you have pop up recommendations, I'd love to hear them. Thanks!

Food vs. "Food"

Once upon a time, not that long ago, when you went to the grocery store, if you shopped the perimeter of the store (produce, meat, dairy, grains, etc) you were considered to be leading a healthy lifestyle as far as nutrition is concerned. Gradually over the years that is no longer the case.

A few weeks ago Monsanto, a biotech company, was in the news again. They are always fighting some lawsuit regarding their genetically modified seeds, etc.  I started writing about it and then deleted it because it sounded very soap box like and, quite frankly, I'm not that fanatical about it. It's not that I don't care I just tend to fall more in the middle on this issue. I listen to these lawsuits and the extremist both directions and appreciate the concerns on both sides. However, it seems to have come to a point that ALL food is no longer good for you...hmmm. This presents a problem as it is necessary for life.

Standing in my grocery store, every where I look, I can recall an article about why I shouldn't consume that product. With the middle aisles we have always been warned that processed food is not as good for you, contains preservatives and all kinds of unpronounceable things. I stand on the perimeter and know that the produce is genetically modified or sprayed with pesticides. The meat has all been injected with steroids that also then affects the dairy and eggs. (Not to mention all the whistle blower articles about the poor treatment of the animals.) Also, somewhere along the line carbs became evil. Great! If I can't shop the middle aisles or the perimeter there is nothing left. So what the hell are we supposed to eat?

Where do I fall on this? I shop both. I try to pick the lesser of the evils and based on my family's reactions to different foods either eliminate or continue to purchase things that maybe aren't on the "healthy to consume" list. I believe there are real food allergies and by all means avoid those foods but I am blessed that my family does not seem to have any of them. If you are all organic, no carb, no gluten, no sugar, hard core all the way kind of person and that works for your family...more power to you, you're awesome. If you have never looked at a label in your life and just buy whatever...that's great too. Whatever works for you and your family is OK with me, I'm certainly not judging. It just saddens me to feel that we, somewhere along the line, became the proverbial frog in the pot and now that it's boiling what do we do?

Curious to know where you fall on this?
Until next time,
Julie

I work out...no..no, I don't.

I've decided that I must really enjoy the horrible way you feel every time you start working out and eating well.  I have come to this conclusion based on the fact that I do it for a period of time until I feel great, I'm in pretty decent shape, and healthy, then I stop just long enough so that when I start I can have the full craptastic starting all over experience again. I don't know why I do this, because I always feel better when I'm active but something happens, illness or injury, that takes me out for a couple of weeks and then the motivation is gone.

I do great if there something I am actually working for. Last year we went to Hawaii. I really made an effort for several months to get into shape so that I could not only look decent on the beach but also that I could participate in all the island activities without dying half way through. I haven't gained the weight back, thankfully, (I gained some at the holidays and lost it when I got braces) but due to not running it has sort of redistributed interestingly on my body. So while the scale still says the same thing, the clothes...not so much. Ugh! Currently I'm doing the don't do anything differently and hope your body changes just because you want it to diet. I'll let you know how that works out.

I'm hoping now that spring is here and I'm actually pulling out the summer clothes I will want to get out there and do something, but until the trees stop blooming...see I can justify anything...hold please...

Just found my motivation...I'll be back in action tomorrow.

Boston 26.2, I'm praying for you!

Until next time,
Julie

Mawwiage...

Mawwiage. Mawwiage is what bwings us togethew today. Mawwiage, that bwessed awwangement, that dweam within a dweam. And wove, twue wove, wiww fowwow you fowevah and evah… So tweasuwe youw wove. ~ The Impressive Clergyman from The Princess Bride. (One of my favorite movies!)

OK, I'm over all the nostalgic posts where I seem to be missing my past and not living in the present. I have just been reflecting lately, because we will be celebrating our 23rd Anniversary on the 14th and I got caught up in the "where we have been" moment. What a journey! 

Weddings are funny things. We stand there and commit to things we have no real concept of, and won't until the years start ticking by and you realize several things. Forever is a really long time. Yay! Forever is a REALLY long time. For better means there are not enough hours in the day to be together...for worse means rolling over some mornings and thinking, "Nope, don't feel like doing that today." In sickness means sitting by a hospital bed for endless hours worried...in health is climbing trails in amazing places. Til death do you part...can't even go there. I can't imagine my life without this man. These things we say so eagerly on the day when we are so blissfully in the moment are real and fabulous and scary and hard and awesome and take real work. All totally worth it if you are both committed...REALLY committed to making it.

I'm racking my brain for ideas for our big day this year and coming up blank. Possibly because we did Hawaii last year and that's a pretty tough act to follow. It doesn't help that I spent the weekend with a couple we have known for 20 some years and his wife had his 67 Mustang overhauled for their 25th anniversary. He wrecked it when they were dating, and it sat on her family's property forever, where he would frequently visit and talk about getting it up and running again. He went to Afghanistan to work for several months so she decided that while he was away she would make that happen for him. How cool is that?! Now Brian is walking around the house reminding me of all the cars he's never owned that would be a great Anniversary gift. Dream on!

My gift is that he still loves me, I still love him, and we choose to be together everyday whether its a good one or bad one. I'm very much looking forward to what else this "mawwiage" will bring in the next 23 years and beyond.

Until next time,
Julie

Missing the navy

Never thought I would say this, but I miss the Navy. It was the only life I knew for 21 years. Brian has been out 2 years this month. He has a great job, that he is enjoying, so it's not like we're suffering being out of the service. I often thought before he got out that there would be this great sense of relief and a need to nest, or settle in, permanently somewhere. Surprisingly, not so much.

One of the worst parts of the military is knowing you will be moving a lot. One of the best parts of the military is knowing you will be moving a lot. Makes no sense? Truly, both are accurate. We started our journey in Idaho Falls, tiny town, tiny run down place, but newly married so who cares. Ha! We took advantage of it being next to Yellowstone Park and visited a couple of times in the 3 months we lived there. (Brian was finishing up his Nuc Training.) From Idaho Falls we moved to Newport News, VA, part of a huge mass of cities that all run together. We were next to beaches and Busch Gardens, visited DC several times. I went to college there, had Kevin, and met some dear friends who we still keep in touch with to this day. It was hard to leave. Transferred down to Kingsland/St. Mary's Georgia. Another tiny town, but we stayed pretty busy with our little group of friends there, had Keegan, and enjoyed the area surrounding us....Amelia Island, Jacksonville, FL. Met another couple who are still very much a part of our lives today. From there transferred to Silverdale, WA, this was absolutely one of the most beautiful parts of the country to live. The mountains and beaches are spectacular...yes, it rains. I have never appreciated nature as much as I did there. On to the Charleston, SC area, probably the place we most considered home. Just a good fit for all of us, great area, great friends, great church. We did VA again and then back SC before getting out. See the pattern... learn new places, meet great people. It was a lot of moving, but we had such an appreciation for all the different parts of the country and what it had to offer, it was so hard to leave the friends we made along the way. I can't imagine that I won't have yearning for that change again.

I miss Brian in his uniform heading out to a ship somewhere. Not only do I think he's good looking in uniform (WOW!), but I have a tremendous sense of pride when I see him wear it. He served his country and he was good at what he did. He made it all the way for an enlisted man. It really speaks of his work ethic and his integrity. I'm just so proud of him.

Navy ships are pretty amazing.  They are floating bases and these guys are good at what they do. We went out a couple of times on a carrier for family days, watching them launch planes and the planes doing maneuvers out at sea is uber impressive, and watching those ships come home with all sailors lining the deck. WOW! I have great respect for the training and sacrifice these guys and gals go through. Also, as a family member, the sacrifice our families make to allow them to do what they do for their country...really just nothing like it. Honestly, as hard as it was (and sometimes I didn't think we'd make it), what an honor to be with a man who served!

Until next time,
Julie

Best April Fools Ever...

A funny thing happened on the way to retirement, (we'll get to April Fools in a few) someone that flipped our world, as we knew it, upside down. A couple of years before Brian retired from the Navy he decided he should make sure that he took care of as many medical issues as he could (that the Navy would cover) so he had physicals, dental, etc. One of the best surgeries he took advantage of was corrective eye surgery (for free...right on!) The last surgery he scheduled was reproductive related...wink, wink. We had tried to have more than two kids without any success for many years and eventually nothing was happening at all. Just to be sure, Brian decided to take care of that permanently. He went to a mandatory all day meeting and was to schedule the surgery. Well...too late! I found out I was pregnant. Did some quick calculating our older boys would be 14 and 18 when this new little critter showed up. WOW!

Fast forward a few months. The surgery was definitely going to take place NOW! There would be no more surprises from this side of the Brentise family. So Brian scheduled the appointment 6 weeks before I was due. This way he would be very much recovered before I needed him. On March 31st he took care of his obligation. Our son, on the other hand, decided that he was done and was not going to wait 6 weeks. So in the wee hours of the morning on April 1st I was trying to NOT have contractions so Brian could continue his recovery. Let me tell you how NOT effective that was. Finally, had to cave and go to the hospital hoping they would stop the labor. My poor husband was being taken care of by nurses on the maternity ward and I was being injected with stuff that made me feel like I was on fire, and then something else that made me about shake off the bed...they did absolutely nothing for the contractions though. I kept apologizing to Brian because I felt so bad that I was making him be with me while he was recovering from his issue, but he kept reassuring me that he was certain what I was experiencing was more painful and to not worry about it. He's a good man!

Anyway, bright and early on April Fools Day our little man was born! He had a rough go of it for the first couple of weeks, (didn't realize that the heart beating thing was mandatory) but once he got the hang of it, we brought him home. He's been an incredible blessing to our family for the last 4 years and we wouldn't change a thing. OK, that might be a stretch...maybe a couple of things that happened along the way, but the boy is definitely a keeper. Happy Birthday, Kieran!

I have a little faith in me

I am sure the first time I popped up in God's ranks wearing my armor murmuring, "Do I have this on right? Is this a belt or a headband? Do these come in a smaller size, it's kind of heavy?" His first thought was, "Great, Julie has crossed over." But, His second thought was, "Where can I put her that she will cause the least amount of damage for my Kingdom."

I have always been a believer, I don't remember a time in my life when I didn't believe. I'm sure that comes from having Christian parents and a grandfather who was a minister. I don't have a before God...AFTER GOD moment. I think for a while I questioned whether I believed because I heard it all my life or if I really BELIEVED. Since then I've done enough craptastic things that left me with no one but God that I'm confidant it's the real deal.

So this amazing thing happens when you become a Christ follower, you are filled with His Spirit, who will teach and guide you if you let him. It's like having a Super Hero inside you that if you listen to the power and allow it to work, God will do amazing things using you...think Jesus. Wow! My problem is I'm not good at accessing that or focusing it. I have had great God moments where I think, "That was so cool, did you see that? That was all God right there!" But most of the time, my moments are less impressive. I feel the battle inside of things I should and shouldn't be doing and sometimes thumb my nose at both. That whole "free will" thing doesn't seem to work in my favor...ever...

I have served in many churches, in many ways, often taking on ministries that are about to dwindle away from lack of help, with the idea that I will just fill the space until a more qualified person comes along. Sometimes God makes me the qualified person. Other times, I've taken positions enthusiastically,  and while I know God equipped me for the job, I manage to muck it up or trip myself up. (insert God eye roll here) My point is, I'm trying. I don't jump every time I feel Him asking me to, but I'm not a complete slacker either. While I may not be in service with the church all the time, we really make an attempt to live our faith every day, hoping it reflects on those around us. I read, study, teach my kids, and pray without ceasing (the bible told me to... so if His ears are bleeding it's on Him). We have teens in and out of house all the time and whether they are mine or not they respect our praying at dinner, or they all tag along to Youth Group on Sunday night. It's who we are, we don't change it because they are in our home.

My faith is an amazing gift and I don't want to abuse it, so I'll keep trucking along and hoping that I will at least have a bench to sleep on somewhere in heaven. Thankfully, I do know I will be there! Now... where's my cape?

Until next time,
Julie

Bonus time...Woo Hoo

Brian is blessed to have gotten a job right away after he retired from the service and it was, thankfully, a pretty easy transition. The company he works for gives bonuses every year based on profit for the year (not unusual, many do). There is some sort of calculation that involves up to a certain percent of their salary, whatever that profit margin was, and how the planets align. I don't know what it is, I just know come March we get a little extra in the paycheck. Yay! We used to get bonuses in the service as well, signing bonuses, they were incentives to keep you in the service if you reup for so many years. That bonus depended on your rate and what they felt like your skills were worth. Brian was a Nuclear Engineer and it was pretty sweet the first couple of times. After a certain number of years there is no bonus, at that point you are clearly a "lifer" and they don't need to entice you anymore. Being able to start collecting retirement checks at 40 is a pretty sweet incentive.

Funny thing about bonuses, people really start to depend on them (National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation). They count it as part of their salary and often times have it mentally spent in their head before it hits the bank, sometimes have spent it in advance by charging and then plan to repay with the bonus. It is part of your salary, it will get taxed, and you will get to spend it, but we have NEVER counted on it or included it in our budget. It has always been what it is...a BONUS. The cool part of viewing it this way is, if it's not as much as you thought, it's OK, if it's more than you thought, awesome. We don't plan for it. It either goes in our savings account, or this year towards a couple of bills and a dang water heater (not fun) and Brian's lift on his Jeep (FUN). This is not to say that I don't like getting it, I totally do, for a couple of reasons, Brian works his butt off and deserves it, and because I'm the saver in our family so the more I can tip the finances in our favor the happier I am.  It's a nice cushion to have, but if next year there is no bonus, we'd be fine and that's what's really important. (Plus we have some in laws that would be happy to bring the boss over to the house so we could get our revenge.)

Now you'll have to excuse me while I go call the pool guy...OK, no, but wouldn't that be nice? We are eating out for dinner, though, you have to splurge a little.

Until next time,
Julie

I Miss the South!

It's official, I'm a southern girl. We've tried many places and the south just seems to be where I am most comfortable. I'm not even partial to the southwest vs. southeast, I'm all about green chili and cheese grits, they're even fabulous together.  I'm just not very good at anything north of, well... the south.

Let's start with location. I grew up in Albuquerque at the foot of the Sandia Mountains. Gorgeous! I miss those mountains and the desert, you can see for miles and sunsets are spectacular there. When I married Brian we lived in many southern coastal cities, VA being as far "north" as we went on that coast. It was my first real experience of living with trees all around me all the time, at first I felt claustrophobic. I LOVED the beaches, though, and the ability to go when the mood strikes, I regret not doing it more, really miss the beaches. Love the swampy area in Georgia and Louisiana and even some areas of South Carolina, Cypress trees and cool creatures. The Midwest has it's own beauty, being able to see crops everywhere you go gives you a real appreciation for the work that goes into the produce in your stores. Seriously, I have huge respect for these farmers. However, all farms all the time is too much for me, I miss other landscape. I would love to come back and VISIT these fabulous folks anytime, though.

Now the weather, I'm a warm weather girl. We had seasons in Alb., probably more so than any other place I've lived. It was nice. In the SE you get a more warm weather than cold, and while the humidity can be brutal in the summer, I would much rather be hot than cold. That's what the AC and the ocean is for, right? Yes, there are hurricanes, but you get tons of notice to evacuate and I'm thankful to say I've not had bad experiences with them, but do know people who have. Here, it's been snowing on and off all day (a week from Spring) AND we are approaching tornado season. I'll admit, I'm a chicken. They are real, big, destructive, you don't get much notice, and every spring I have to spend time in my basement. I'M NOT A FAN! Ideally my seasons would run something like this: Summer until school starts and then fade to Fall, Fall until Thanksgiving weekend and then bring on the snow, Winter until January 1 and then I'm over it. It should be Spring now (because I want it to be) because we just switched to Daylight Savings Time and I want my extra hour of light in the evening to be WARM!!! Actually, let's skip spring since it brings tornadoes and just bring on summer!

There are so many other things I miss about the south. I miss the accents and even the cliches about them...bless their hearts. I miss the food. From the SW I miss green chili and spicy New Mexican food. From the coasts, I miss fresh seafood, shrimp and grits, frogmore stew. I spent quite a bit of time in Louisiana growing up and I miss their Cajun attitude, and boudin, beignets, french coffee, and crab gumbo. I just was raised in the southern part of the country and that's where I belong. I'm glad we came up here and got to know these people and experience the area, but it has confirmed that, at heart, I'm a southern girl!

Until next time,
Julie

Coffee...YES, PLEASE!

My dad sent a card in the mail with something about coffee on it and reminded me that I haven't blogged about it, and since I'm ridiculous in my quest for it, it seems it would be a good topic. I'm a coffee addict. That does not mean I'm a connoisseur, I can tell the difference between good or bad and that's it... not where it was grown, or how the beans were roasted, or whether a cat pooped it out...Kopi Luwak, seriously...look it up.  It just means I must start and sometimes end my days with a couple of cups, and if ever offered I won't turn it down. I believe coffee is the best gift God gave us after Jesus. My family is a close third, but I actually need the coffee to deal well with all blessings that follow Jesus.

I have always liked coffee but didn't have a real appreciation for it until we moved to WA state. Its a very temperate climate, never super cold never super hot, but coming from the south I could not get warm so started really indulging. That's when all the twitching started. Had to actually switch to hot water between coffees because I was not sleeping much. There are coffee shops on every corner in the NW, many major chains started there so it was so readily available. Anyway, I really started to appreciate a great cup of coffee during that time span, and when we moved back to the south I found it could be 100 degrees out and I still wanted it.

This addiction has led to the purchase of ridiculously priced coffee machines. My husband has a Keurig at work. I currently have a Nespresso machine that makes wicked good coffee drinks that rival any coffee shop, and I love it. Yet, when we walk in the door of our local shop they have already rung us up with our usual.  We ran in to one of the teenagers that works there at a different restaurant and we said hello. His friends asked if he knew us and he said, "Yes, two medium skinny vanilla lattes, decaf if it's dark out." Hmm... I'm thinking we should exchange names sometime.  I would hate to actually track how much we've spent on those drinks over the course of a month or so, Dave Ramsey would have a field day with us.

So if you ever need to get away or talk with someone, offer to take me to coffee and I'm your girl. I'm off for now. Guess where I'm going? Cheers!

Until next time,
Julie

Throwing the kids under the bus...

This weekend we were talking about the Internet and our kids with a group of other parents. There are a range of ages of children and I find that I am able to use things my boys have done as examples. Yes, I throw them under the bus. I do actually tell the boys that I've had these conversations and why and make sure they know the context. They understand it. Having said that, often times the people we are talking to don't personally know my kids. I'm afraid they might have a bad impression of them.

I have had the ability and privilege of staying home with my boys. I play with them, love them, yell at them, teach them, etc. It has been a most rewarding experience. They are awesome. They do great in school, most of the time. They are well mannered, most of the time. They are loyal to their family and friends. Like all kids they have had bad moments and those tend to be the things that are discussed. Bummer!

Here's the deal though. We have gone through a lot of things where we had no references or people with similar experience to help us navigate that and I am all for co-parenting with every good parent I know. Regardless of how awesome you are at handling things, regardless of how many times you've warned your kids against things, they will still get into trouble. I love that I have a group of people who I can sit around a table with and we can all share our experiences good or bad...this worked or this didn't... how do I get out of this?... how do I avoid this?

What they don't see is my 17 year old running around the house playing Nerf war with my 3 year old, or both older boys (21 and 17) playing hide and seek with the "baby".  They don't see them doing the dishes because I made dinner, taking out the trash, washing the cars, helping build a fence, or babysitting so their dad and I can have a date night. They don't see us praying together around the dinner table every night and then cutting up about our day. They don't see family game night or movie night where we all just hang out and laugh. I have great kids! I'm super proud of them! And now you know...

Until next time,
Julie

Education is not my gift

There has been a big push lately towards homeschooling. I have huge respect for the parents that do this and know several. They post pictures of their kids sitting in academically decorated rooms doing their work. I am amazed! Seriously!

I will never be that mom. I learned early on that I don't have the discipline or disposition to do this. When my older boys were younger  it was all I could do to get homework assignments completed. There was generally a lot of whining, stalling, and googling and I'm not talking about them. I always felt like whatever grade they were in, so was I. As they got higher up in their education they passed me. In high school my oldest would often come down to ask me about a homework assignment, and I used to think it was so cute that he thought I was smart enough to answer a calculus question...um, no...you're going to have to Google that, son.

The idea of coming up with a daily plan or routine sounds great, but I just can't put it into action. I now have my little man, who is 3, and next fall he will start pre-k somewhere outside of this house. I bought a big calendar and for a few days we tried to have more structured time... dates, days, weather, ABC's, 123's, but he wasn't interested so neither was I.  This is not to say that I don't do "educational" things with him. We color, paint, sing songs, play games. I quiz him on colors, make him count things, try to teach him his letters, read stories but  if he loses interest that's ok with me. I don't know where he stands educationally, I hope he's hanging in there. My other two are doing great so I'm just not that worried about it.

So what do I teach my boys? (How to cuss like a sailor....no, see other post.) These are the things I'm working on:

For those of you that homeschool...You Rock!! As for me, I love teachers, my kids have had great ones and I will continue to support their employment. 

Until next time,

Julie

Does anyone watch movie award shows?

The Oscars were on last night, I think this is the Super Bowl of Hollywood award shows so we should be done for a while. I don't generally watch them. I am a girl so I do head over to the rag mags in the morning to see what everyone wore or didn't wear (yikes), but as for the shows themselves... that's a lot of ego in one building. I think every business has an end of the year reward banquet, but Hollywood takes it, as it does everything else, to a ridiculous extreme. It seems that there have been shows weekly to pat the same people on the back for the same movies. Shouldn't one award cover it? You win!  I know it's different academies or corporations that host each one, but clearly there were only so many movies to pull from. If the general consensus is that this person or this movie rocked this year, then there are only so many ways to celebrate that.

I would say the goal each season is to add yet another award show, and then for all the shows to try to outdo each other and the year before. The actors try to WOW us with red carpet costumes that either flatter or fail, and often test the laws of physics. The hosts have to push the envelope a little more, the jokes become raunchier or meaner, the behavior more ridiculous. It's pretty low class at what appears to be classy events based on the amount of money spent on the dresses, jewels, tuxes, hair, make up, etc. The networks are trying to avoid boring you and yet the antics carry the shows well past their already 3 hour time slots. Don't get me wrong, there are a few great moments that add up to a few great minutes in those 3+ hours. Inevitably, the following mornings are filled with complaining because, surprise, you can't make everyone happy.

I LOVE movies. I love to go sit and escape for a couple of hours. I love buttered popcorn and milk duds.  I love the visual and audio affects. I love the story lines, I love good actors. I am a huge supporter. I just don't care to see them all pat each other on the back. By all means, have the ceremonies, but don't feel like you need to televise the whole show. I don't make movies, all of the minute details that go into making them seamless are incredible, I just don't need to see who won Best Gaffer. I'm happy pretending that the stories magically appear on the big screen and completely whisk me away to another place. I know a good movie or actor when I see one, and honestly, don't we each have our own opinions about that? I don't need Hollywood to tell me.

If you are fan of these shows, watch on! I think I'm going to pass. I'll just catch a movie.
Until next time,
Julie

Money

Money is an amazing thing, we all know that no matter how much we have it isn't enough. We grow into our salaries, we get better cars, bigger houses, which in turn requires bigger payments and more maintenance. Our kids are spoiled (because we want to give them things), they have the latest and greatest of everything, a car, college...Yikes! I just seem to have a vacuum hose attached to my bank account, can you hear that sucking sound? The cycle is frustrating. I don't even have credit card debt, thankfully. We made a point of avoiding that pitfall. 

I was thinking back to some of the best times in our lives. We lived in VA on Fort Monroe with some of our best friends very near. We lived in tiny townhouses built in the 50's with two bedrooms, one bathroom ( it was upstairs...it had peach and black tile, ew). Our washer and dryer were in the kitchen and had to do dual duty as counters because we didn't have any. The guys would go off to work and we'd run from one house to the other drinking coffee, kids playing. We'd hang out and gab, then, about an hour before the guys came home, we'd all run home, make dinner, and clean up our little houses so it didn't look like we did nothing all day. Some nights we'd go have hash brown casserole and play board games at someone else's house, or we'd BBQ outside and all hangout in our back yards. It was awesome. It also required no money, because we didn't have it. The guys had no rank still, so you paid bills, bought food, and figured out how you were going to entertain each other. There was no pressure because it just was what it was. We were happy! 

I'm not saying I'm not happy now, but just thinking it might be time to get back to the basics. It's amazing how resourceful you become when you have to be. I saw an article about a woman who decided that she was going to go a whole year without unnecessary spending. They calculated their basic  bills and gave themselves a small set amount over for spending (clearly no money is not realistic). She said it was life changing, aside from saving TONS of money, they got to be great about finding free entertainment in their community. They also grew closer to their friends, who instead of meeting at restaurants or movies would meet at each other houses which lead to longer visits and more in depth conversations. It was a great article and made me think of our experience at Fort Monroe. 

I guess ultimately I have to decide, do I let money guide all my decisions, or do I guide my decisions about my money. I don't want it run me, anymore. I'm turning that vacuum off. I'm the human, I'm in charge! RAWR!!! 

Off to pay the bills now...

Until next time,

Julie

What Time Zone Am I In?

Since we've moved here, I have a new appreciation for the time zones. That red line that meanders through the state is the time zone line. We live in Knox County which is in the SW part of IN, we are the last purple colored county in the SW corner there...you see it? Our town is on the west side of Knox just about the middle.

I'm not smart enough to live here!

If you go west, time change, there is a state border there, very obvious. Got it! If you go south 20 miles, time change...wait...what? I'm still in Indiana. I had to drop someone off for a meeting in Princeton and didn't realize the time had changed, I thought I got them there REALLY EARLY. Thankfully, I didn't, because he is smarter than I am and already did the math for me, it was fine. We have friends who live in Evansville (CT) and for awhile her husband worked in Edwardsport (ET). We first met them at a restaurant before we moved here, she asked him what time it was and he said 5:30 HER time...Ok?! For several years they lived on her time/his time. Wow, tough gig! We also go to church with some great people who live on the Illinois side. They work there and school there, they shop both sides and church here. I think I would need 2 watches. (Or maybe just a better functioning brain.)

Thankfully, all of my daily activity takes place in one time zone. We occasionally head to Evansville so we can go to the mall or have more variety in restaurants.  My favorite is heading to SC, I drive south into Central Time, then head East, and drive awhile before I'm back into Eastern Time. Ok, sure, whatever...

You get the hang of it after awhile and you get used to hearing "Be there at (?) my time" or "your time". The first few months were a bit of a headache, though.

All I know is... it's 5 o'clock somewhere.
Until next time,
Julie

Side effect of braces...losing weight!

About a week ago I started the brace face journey for the second time. I had braces as a teenager, but then got married, left home, and didn't wear my retainer ever again. As a result, when my wisdom teeth grew in they pushed my front teeth back into their previously crooked position. Not my brightest moment. So all that money my parents spent? I don't even want to think about it. I have a son in braces now and the idea of his letting his teeth go after 18 months of payments makes me nauseous. I'm hoping to have his retainer cemented to his teeth. Seriously!

After about a week of having hardware in my mouth I have made a couple of discoveries. One, I'm still not a fan of braces. I do have white braces this time so they are not as noticable as the bright silver ones of my youth. I will only have to wear them about 6 months vs. years, but they are still uncomfortable and make eating a challenge.

Two, I've lost a couple of pounds. I already new I would have to give up some of my favorite foods: hot tamales, popcorn, milk duds, corn chips...sigh. Ok, I know these aren't technically a big deal in the big scheme of things, but annoying just the same. What is the point of going to the movie theater now? However, just cutting those things will make a difference in how my pants fit.

In the last few days I've made a new discovery, I am now not of fan of eating at all. All my food choices are measured by how much time I will be in the bathroom cleaning my teeth after. As a result pretty much all snacking is out, totally not worth it. To be honest, meals are pretty sparse too. Basically, if I can't swallow it without chewing, I'm not interested. For those of us already self concious about our smile (hence the braces) the idea of having a bunch of food caught in your teeth is... Ew! I don't want to feel it and I certainly don't want anyone to see it. So what do I eat? Baby food, not really, but might as well. On the positive side, I'll be a cheap date, pancakes, oatmeal, pasta...usually the least expensive things on the menu. Yay for Brian!

I'm thinking now might be a good time to become a juicer.

Until next time,
Julie

I Swear!

My name is Julie Brentise, and I say bad words.

Whew! I'm so glad I got that off my chest. I don't know if there is a 12 step program for this but it seems there should be. I really struggle with this particular bad habit. I try to blame it on many things: I have red hair, it's my Cajun genes, it's a day that ends in day. Ultimately, I know I am responsible for my own language and yet, as the great Ron White would say, "I had the right to remain silent, but I didn't have the ability."

I don't use bad language in every day conversation,  but if I get worked up about something I suddenly lack any sort of intelligent vocabulary. Wait... that's not true, I absolutely can speak intelligently about anything AND pepper it with 4 letter words, too. I'm bilingual like that. For the most part, I'm pretty level headed, but if someone picks at my husband, my kids or kids I care about... it's on! I'll start telling Brian about some injustice that happened to one of the kids and turn into a sailor. Whoa! I'm not mad at him he doesn't need to hear my potty mouth. My older boys have heard these conversations as well, I'm usually coming to someone's defense but could certainly choose better words. Later, I feel the need to go back and apologize for my language. Good grief! Knock it off! And here's a proud moment, apparently "damn it" seems to be my go to word(s), I know this because my 3 year old uses it...sigh... and he uses it correctly (I'm a little proud of that part). GREAT!! Not the kind of teachable moments I'm looking for.

I've decided I need an intervention. I'm hoping those of you that know me will call me out when you hear me swearing, of course if I'm really wound up you may want to back up a little first. In the meantime, I will just keep asking the Lord to keep his arm around my shoulder and His hand over my mouth.

Until next time,
Julie

Cake

My son's birthday is today and I just spent a few hours sticking 405 tiles on his Minecraft cake, so had a few mindnumbing moments to think about the process that I go through when making cakes.

Let's pretend he's a client. He would be considered a difficult one, he likes chocolate and that's about all I get. This is where I would normally start the interrogation to get as much info about this person as I possibly can and start throwing out ideas. These ideas are generally shot down rapid fire, because while they don't know what they want...they absolutely know what they DON'T want. I will often throw out really crazy things because it does start making them focus their thoughts. Once we've narrowed it down, (in Keegan's case, I just made the executive decision to do Minecraft logo due to his current passion about it) I will draw (badly) a picture of what they seem to be visualizing. For this cake, I just uploaded the logo.

Next, I panic! Seriously, look at that thing. Can I really do this? This happens with every cake. No joke. I've been making them a while but what if I forgot what I'm doing? Or what if I flat out can't follow through on an idea. Ah!

So clearly this cake will need to be square, and it will need enough layers to be a perfect cube. That math I didn't think I needed...I suddenly need. Obviously, the cake pan determines the length and width for me, but then I have to make it the same height, which involves how many inches cake + how much icing in between = this many perfectly high inches. Snore.... Needless to say, we have a cube. I then dirty ice it and stick it in the freezer. Dirty ice, just means a thin coat of icing that will hold down all the crumbs (once chilled) so that when you are ready to really ice it you get a beautiful crumb free icing. Try it, makes life so much easier.

Right now it's pretty ugly, and pretty scary. Hate when people drop in at this stage, then we're all panicked. I don't need it to be smooth since I'm putting all those tiny tiles on it.  I do need to put enough icing on to taste good and for the tiles to sink in to when I press them flat to appear to be a smooth wall of tiles. The reason for the brown and green icing? Think grout. Actually from here on out, think tiling and grouting. The tiles are not perfect and so some of the icing might show through and we wouldn't want it to be white, that doesn't match. Tacky! Now starts the mindnumbing part. Cutting all those tiles...

...and sticking them on the cake...

...and we're tiling...and we're tiling...Oy! 

Finally I finish up, grab a large flat paddle and smoosh all the tiles in and hope nothing is gushing out the other side. I try to make the walls appear as flat as possible and the cube to appear to be...well, cube like. I then transfer the cake to a clean board, put some kind of edge around the bottom, and write cute things on it. 

Perhaps not as complicated as you thought, but often way more time consuming than you think.

That will be $1,000,000, please.

Until next time,

Julie

HAL 9000

Every time I get on FB and see the prompt "How are you doing, Julie?" or "What are you doing, Julie?" I hear it as HAL 9000 from "A Space Odyssey."

I'll be honest, it creeps me out a little. I like FB  I like seeing what everyone is up to and love seeing pics of my family and friends who live far away. It makes me feel connected in some small way.

This post is not actually about FB so much as it is about computers in general. We have a Mac we inherited from hubby's dad when he passed. It's awesome and easy to use...and smarter than me. It irritates me. I can't help but think my computer is mocking me at times or intentionally thwarting my efforts to do something. I know that all software programs are written by man.  I often try to visualize who the creators might be as I'm working on things. We have software that tries to think ahead of me, like Auto Correct, and generally messes me up because it doesn't know me, knock it off, I can do this myself. I'm fairly certain it was written by a lovely English teacher, who essentially is red marking my paper as I write it. "Just trying to help, dear." We also have software that requires a large manual just to do basic things, like Photoshop. I know that the computer is staring at me and snickering because I can't alter this picture and it's not going to help me. I'm positive Photoshop creator is a snobby New York photographer that "graced" us with this program and if I'm not smart enough to use it, well that's on me. I'm sure once I read the Photoshop Bible I too will have perfect photos, but getting there...frustrating!

So while the idea of HAL 9000 still creeps me out a little, I would love to be able to prompt my computer to either back off or help me out and have it respond accordingly...without the whole trying to kill me thing.

Until next time,
Julie

Punctuation

I don't know who reads this, even though I mentioned all the stats they send me in another blog, I don't see your names or any other info about you. I do know some really smart people, so thought I should talk a little about punctuation (and grammar too, for that matter) because, clearly, I abuse it. I'm sorry.

I love punctuation: semi-colons, colons, parenthesis, commas, periods, exclamation points. They are all so fun to sprinkle throughout my writing. I write how I talk, if I paused there I'm going to put some form of punctuation. If I have a thought in the middle of a sentence I might throw some brackets or parenthesis around it. I don't really remember the rules for all of these and, to be honest, I don't really feel like looking them up. I'm sure I have sentences that run on and on, and some that are missing key things like a subject or other very important part that make a sentence complete. I fall into the your, you're, to, too, affect, effect trap all the time. I generally try to catch it but if I don't, meh...

I'm sure this is making all of my smart friends very uncomfortable. I blame all this new fangled technology on my casual use of the English language/punctuation. I can type on my phone, my pad, or my computer. I can FB, or tweet, or text, and the shorter the better as long as I've made my point. Based on my kids texts, I'm thinking you should be happy that I use any punctuation at all, capitalize the beginning of my sentences, and put vowels in all my words. I'm brilliant comparatively.

I'm not proud of these errors, but I'm also not writing a speech for the president or a boss. I'm not filling out applications or writing essays to professors. I'm at home with my kids, cleaning my house...kinda, and trying to be a good wife. If I have five minutes to fill you in on something it's probably gonna be fast and dirty.

Until next time,
Julie

Raising children is like being pecked to death by a chicken

I had this sign in my house when I was going through my everything-in-the-kitchen-must-have-a-chicken-on-it phase. I bought it when my older two were little boys, because it so captured how I felt at that time. I took it down when they were old enough to understand what it implied. Low and behold we have another and it still applies. Don't get your undies in a knot! I love my boys. They are awesome, but there is always some truth to those quotes we post or they wouldn't be funny. While I'm writing this, a song from the Music Man is running through my head, "Pick a little, talk a little, pick a little, talk a little, cheep, cheep, cheep, talk a lot, pick a little more," another chicken analogy. Does this not sound like little kids to you? Examples, not even personal ones because pretty sure we all have had these experiences:

"Mom, mom, mom, mommy, mom, MOM, MOMMY" I'm looking right at him.  ...peck, peck, peck...

Haven't said two words to you all day, and then the phone rings and they won't leave you alone the entire time you're on it. ...peck, peck, peck...

Fingers under the bathroom door while you're in it.  ...peck, peck, peck...

"Look at me. Look. WATCH! Look at me. Look what I can do" ...peck, peck, peck...

Tears around the house like a tornado, but when you need them to hurry so you can go somewhere s u d d e n l y  s h i f t  t o  s l o w  m o t i o n.   ...peck, peck, peck...

"I'm hungry, NOW!" "Get me some food!" "I'm starving!" As I'm rushing around making dinner, but as soon as I put the plate down he takes two bites and is done.   ...peck, peck, peck...

Sound affects all day long.  Every toy not only has it's own built in sounds but the boys added spits, beeps, roars, and crashes.  ...peck, peck, peck...

Ok, enough, I'm annoying myself, you get the idea. I really do love little kids and wouldn't trade mine for the world, there are just times or even moments in time where I just need a minute...just one minute that is quiet, so I can catch my breath and prepare for the next attack.

Then the teen comes home...we'll tackle that another day.

They sure are precious when their sleeping.
Julie

Blogging

I didn't blog yesterday we had a busy day between little man not feeling well, church, and heading out for a Super Bowl Party. Besides, I probably won't write something everyday, my life is just not that fascinating.

This blogging thing has been fun for me. I pretty much sit here, write a few paragraphs, and send it out into the universe. I have been caught off guard a couple of times because someone will say something, in person, about what I've written and I have to sit there and process that for a minute, "Hmm, I don't remember talking to you about that." Duh! I guess I didn't really expect anyone to read it?! Also, having not researched this before starting (that's pretty much how I roll) I didn't realize they track so much information, not only how many people have read the blog, but daily stats, traffic sources, countries...and there are graphs and charts and WHAT??? Suddenly I feel all this pressure! This thing that is just supposed to be a fluid way for me to throw out opinions or ideas has been WAY over analyzed. Really! I don't need to know all of that. I'm not selling anything or advertising anything. Heck, I'm not even paying to use the service. I don't know anybody in Germany, why are they reading my nonsense? Yikes! Should I be more thoughtful in my blogs, but why? The whole point of it is I'm just an average mom and this is how we average people get through our days. So I'm choosing to not pay attention to any of that and carry on with the original plan. Deep breath...exhale.

Bis zum nachsten Mal (Until next time... in German...or something like that)
Julie

Weekends, UGH!

All posts will not be filled with humor, some of them will just be pathetic...like this one.

"What do you want to do?"
"I don't know, what do you want to do?"
"We could go to the store?"
"Do you need anything?"
"No..."

I would love to say that I enjoy weekends, but I don't. I'm sure this is a foreign concept for many of you as you live for the weekends. I like routine. I like the hamster wheel. It's predictable. Weekends are too much unplanned time for me. I know... I know... I could make plans and sometimes do, but we play this game where none of us wants to plan the others weekend, it would be rude. So instead we have NO plan. There are a few things that happen consistently, I get to sleep in on Saturdays, hubby gets to sleep in on Sundays, and of course church on Sunday mornings. (Oh, and teen will have all his friends over here all weekend from the moment they pile off the bus on Friday. I do love those kids, though!)

I think, unfortunately, we get the work hard aspect of life, but are forgetting how to play. It is more complicated when the kids are so far apart in age. What can we do that both a 3 year old and 16 year old are going to find interesting or entertaining? (Being in a small town complicates it further.) Therein, lies the dilemma. So we spend time doing with one or the other or leaving them behind for "dates".

So where am I going with this? No seriously, I'm asking? Maybe for now this is just where we are in life, and don't get me wrong...life is good. I'm just not a fan of weekends. Right now they are more work than week days. See...pathetic...sigh...

Julie

Housecleaning, this will be short, I don't do it.

     When my older two were young I cleaned like a mad person. They were not going to get dirty on my watch. I was on top of clutter, laundry, dishes, dusting, vacuuming, sweeping, mopping, etc. I was always doing something. The house was clean, the kids were clean, and I was exhausted. I was also incredibly resentful. I spent most moments of the day thinking, "I just cleaned that!"

     Guess what, I'm over it!

     I'm a housewife, not a maid. Dirt happens! I had to find a happy balance for me so that I could be part of this family without feeling like the unpaid help. Now I keep clutter under control and concentrate on the bathrooms and the kitchen, because those are the rooms I feel should be clean. We have this great rule in our house: If you make dinner, you don't clean up the dinner dishes. Woo Hoo! I came up with that...points for me! That doesn't  necessarily mean the floors in those rooms are cleaned everyday, though. I sweep when the floors feel crunchy. Mopping consists of putting a clorox clean up wipe under each foot and skating around the kitchen. I vacuum when I can see stuff on the carpet. I hand my little man the swiffer and let him take care of the dusting. That's right, nothing above 4 feet high is dusted. I'll get to it...eventually. I do try to do a load of laundry a day, but am not always successful. My middle son's room looks like a bomb went off, does it bother me? YES, but not enough to get in there and do something about it. Besides, if he wants to go somewhere bad enough it gets cleaned. I have the honor of being married to an amazing man who takes care of all outside duties, is open to some inside chores, and helps with the child rearing. Big points to him, since I'm not a fan of outside duties.

     So what does this mean? There are dust bunnies in the corner, spiderwebs on the ceilings, the baseboards could use a good scrubbing, but I'm much happier now. I'll worry about being spotless after the kids leave home. Besides, it builds up their immunities, right?

Julie

PS Warn me before you come over, I'll clean a spot for you to sit a spell.

Pinterest - Because we don't talk enough about it.

     Pinterest has a way of making me feel like Wonder Mom and completely inadequate in the space of a few short minutes. I have found amazing places to visit, food to eat, cakes to make, clothes, costumes, decorations, DIY anything. I have had great success with some, which I will share in a minute, and huge failures with others...see craftfail.com (none of those are mine, but similar results. Oy!).  My favorite has been what to do with leftover bottles. I have a few. We have wine bottles in the windows that cast beautiful colors when the sun shines through. We store things in others. They come in all kinds of beautiful shapes, sizes, and colors filled with yummy liquids. Until Pinterest, though, I didn't know what to do with these beauties:

     They have a cool shape and I hate to throw them away. Disclaimer: I do not have a drinking problem, but I do have a junior in college, a junior in high school, and a 3 year old. An occasional beverage is required. So, I found a nifty craft on Pinterest and turned it into this:

Directions were short and simple: take off label, spray paint bottle bronze, paint on prefered outer color, sand raised surfaces. Even I could do that!!!

     These are future dust collectors for people I love. I will be making and sending them out to everyone I know that drinks Crown. (I can mass produce like that!!)  Mostly, I'm thrilled to have found something to do with them. They were supposed to be Christmas presents, but I didn't get them done in time. Oh, did I mention I'm a procrastinator.  I would post other successes but quite frankly, it was all about the bottles.

Long story short...Pinterest is my friend, except when it isn't. I keep trying, though. Drink, anyone? Julie

TMI Brentise Style? What does that even mean?

     Don't panic, I won't be posting anything too inappropriate just maybe things that you would otherwise keep to yourselves. Why? Because I'm pretty sure someone else has done the same thing and it's more common than you think.

     So, I'm a mom. I'm not Martha Stewart. I'm probably more like you than any other mom out there, we just aren't well represented. Maybe there is a fear that we are not good enough because we don't grow everything we eat, make everything we use and wear, or live on less than $2/day. Let's face it, we fake it til we make it with parenting. Take all the tips you can, discard what doesn't work in your family, use what does.

     The point is, I'm really doing the best I can with the resources I have, be that financial, spiritual, or just how much sanity I have left in the moment. I have awesome parent moments that are cancelled out by the less than awesome moments. My kids have a roof over their head, food in their bellies, and lots of love in their lives.

     I'm starting this so I can see how we progress through time and maybe remember stories along the way that would otherwise be forgotten. A virtual scrapbook, because I can't seem to get my act together to make a real one. Pictures that have never left my phone might actually be put to good use. My kids are bound to be mortified, I wouldn't be doing my job otherwise, but you may be as well. So begins the journey...

Julie